we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
