p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
My dick has a subreddit
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
