Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize