what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
