I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
