Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
