oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize