did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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