We should be called the Road Head Warriors
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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