is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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