so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
