But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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