Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
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