Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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