I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
