And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
