I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize