As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
