SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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