Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
