He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
