Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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