we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Randomize
