Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I'm bleeding and have questions
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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