if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
