Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
