just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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