omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Randomize
