feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Randomize
