In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
he puts the penis in happiness.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Pants are for mortals
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
