I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
