But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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