you guys were way drunker than both of me
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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