pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize