oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize