Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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