Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
