when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Randomize
