My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
