I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Your cock deserves a montage
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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