kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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