Fine. I'll sleep in my office
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Panties = found
Randomize
