you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
