looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
