why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
