im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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