i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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