He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I fill condoms, not promises.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
So much Jack, so little girl.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
