Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize