It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
